An article entitled "The Pair and Spare Dating Program" on SurvivingDating.com suggests that women should keep three men on deck at all times. Deborah Cooper says that it's alright for women to date up to three men at a time. What do you think? She says that men do it all the time...does that make it right? Weigh in!

In an interview scheduled to air Friday night (11/6/09) Rihanna exclaims "eff love" when it comes to domestic violence. While I agree with her sentiment, too many Black women don't. They often find themselves right back in the relationship while fooling themselves into thinking that it won't happen again. Do you know of any stories?

There's an article on theroot.com that argues that Gay marriage is a civil rights issue and that by extension, it is a Black issue. Whether you agree with that or not, it is true that more Blacks are coming out and professing their homosexuality. Can Gay love be considered Black love? Is it as powerful as the love between a Black man and Black woman? 

 There has been some speculation that Alecia Keys and Gabriel Union are home wreckers. This may or may not be true. However, it raises the question: what should be the fate of home wreckers? Should they be left alone because if the wife was handling her business then they wouldn't have gotten him. OR Should they beat down and shunned by society? OR some other horrible fate...be specific. 

There's an interview on BlackVoices.com (HERE) with the author of the book shown above. It's raises some good questions about Black women and marriage.

Black women:

How do you feel about marriage?

Are you married?

Do you want to get married?

Black men:

Are you intimidated by successful Black women?

Why don't some Black men want to get married?

Is marriage for the birds?

What qualities do we as Black people, both men and women, want to see in each other? It is a question that we struggle with everyday. We need to repair our relationships but to do that we need to know what we want in another mate. I don’t pretend to speak for every man, but I was listening to a song that I think summarizes what REAL men want in their REAL women.

But before I get to the song about REAL women, I want to talk about REAL men. When I say REAL men, what do I mean?  Well, I have compiled a list (that is by no means exhaustive) that I think characterizes what a REAL man is. It is as follows:

1.       A REAL man is in touch with his emotions- He understands (as Cornel West states) intimacy and vulnerability. He has to be willing, above all, to give of himself fully. If not, then he cannot love a woman fully because of his fear of “falling on his face” or being made a fool of. A REAL man will not let his insecurities prevent him from loving a woman with all of his spirit because he understands that to receive fully, you must give fully.

2.       A Real man is responsible and perseveres through the madness – If your man is complaining all the time about “the man” or is always making excuses then he probably is not a REAL man. REAL men understand that it’s hard and that the system is “rigged” but they push on anyway and rarely make excuses.

 Loveblacklove readers, do you want to listen to and participate in an interesting discussion? Then tune in to the broadcast shown below! If you're reading this after the air date, don't worry. You can still listen to the recorded version. Have fun and leave your comments about the show and the topic here at loveblacklove.com! CLICK HERE or the picture above to listen!

On Wednesday October 21st at 6:00 p.m. (PST), advice columnist and author Deborrah Cooper, along with a panel of guest experts, will address the issues surrounding male refusal to use birth control and the tendency many men have to place sole responsibility on women. But why refuse to take responsibility for your sperm guys, then get angry when you end up being a father?

Show Date :  Wednesday October 21, 2009

Show Time:   6:00 pm (PST) / 9:00 pm (EST)

To participate in the live broadcast, call 347-327-9215.  All calls will be taken on a first-come, first served basis.  Click graphic above to be taken directly to the show page!

 An old article from 2006 (READ HERE) explores the declining rates of marriage within the Black community. It would seem that the article is even more relevant today. For the first time ever, we have a Black First family, and yet we seem to be losing the the battle to save Black marriage. Two questions: (1) Why are so many of us, men and women, not marrying each other? (2) Does it even matter?